Suprise!

Not yet! I am still here in the office ;). Not even dare to take any leave as they are so many pending work that need to be completed. Though I walk and work like a snail, my passion doesn't stop me from going to the office. Hehe tipu sebenarnya, if my husband is not in the same building I might be working from home je sekarang ni. Definitely I am not fit to drive already. Tummy resting on my lap, mengah2, nak terkucil la ngan false contractions lagi haih!.

This is the stage where you really want it to be over as soon as possible. Tapi of course baby is safer to be inside until the time come. I can start to write a long whining post about my condition now but I shall stop on that :p. So let's concentrate on what is interesting.

As usual they are so many things I like to plan in my life la kan. Keep on planning, some plan fly through, some plan kena abandon ship. Like really I want to have a nice travel plan for this year but since I had my miscarriage late last year and my work went up and down and suddenly get pregnant again, no long haul travel plan get materialized. Poor my kids keep on complaining about why we are stuck here not going anywhere. Huh but not going anywhere pun at least we bring them to local tourist places byk jugak. Poodah la budak2 ni!.

The latest craze that my hubby and me have in our mind is to tear up the house he bought in PJ and rebuild again. Actually the house is where his mom's stayed currently and due to some family financial issue he bought over the house. It's quite old already, leaking here and there. Since I kinda like my current job and hubby potential work is all over KL and PJ area as well, maybe moving to PJ is not a bad idea after all. Contradicting with what I have thought for the past few years. But traveling from KL to Klang is really killing me and I would really appreciate if the house is near to the office I can at least inspect my kids during lunch hour, or get back earlier if I had the chance. Well it's all about how to bring our kids closer to us actually.

I know the fact that my parents will miss the kids so much, but it will not stop them from 'kidnapping' the kids during weekend or school holiday. I even thinking about calling ustaz every Friday night for some Quran lessons where my parents and in laws can come over and we had a family boding during this time. Then of course they can sleep over or bring the kids back to Sijangkang.

So the plan...(berangan mode) is year 2011 to get the architect to draw our house plan then get all the necessary approval to tear up the house. Then by end of the year of 2011 is to start demolishing the house then building early year 2012. We have started to look for a potential architect and house design. I actually draw the house plan already with my imagination. Of course having a little cat fight with hubby here and there since both of us have poor creative imagination when come to building/designing a house and to make sure that we are align on this.

So this is one sample of the house that is 50% like what we have imagined....
http://www.razinarchitect.com/project_mahmud_01.html

The most important part is the kitchen. Well it always the kitchen that I dream off first.However until now I can't find a sample that is similar to what I have visualize. Have to keep on searching or maybe just get the architect to advice me on that.

I feel better of spilling what is my recent berangan mode. Owh some of you might wonder what happen to my previous berangan mode of having that super mini cooper car right ? Dah terkubur la after weighing the pros and cons. Bak kata my colleague...tu semua nafsu sahaja.

Anyway they are more berangan idea in my list. Is just this one is taking half of the space in my mind besides works. That way it takes my mind away from whining and complaining about my current condition and thinking bile lah baby ni nak pop out :D

It's almost there

I really think it will come sooner than the EDD date. My EDD date suppose to be on the 19th if January which is 6 weeks away from now. I know that during my previous 2 pregnancy I deliver earlier by 2-3 weeks so I have anticipated that it might be end of December or early Jan. However all the sign of having early labor has started and it's kinda freak me out haha. I don't know why I'm freaking out this time. Workload maybe...I still feel that they are a lot more to settle. I have training next week followed by mock up session where I have sent out the invitation list.

Then baby preparation...to be honest I just have 4 pairs of baby clothing with me now. Few other items are ready but they are more to buy!!!. My hospital bag is not even ready yet! I haven't buy my maternity socks...I am very particular with socks so I need to get a good one else I won't wear any. My room at my mom's house still in a mess though thank God that I have slowly started to clean it up for the past few days. Gosh seriously...what am I thinking!!!

This is why I think that the time is near. Which I hope I still have 2-3 weeks to go. First I get really clumsy and tired now. I mean more clumsier...I start to lose my focus, patient over things. What I need is just to rest ...and sleep and rest and sleep. Last weekend we stayed in Traders Hotel for a wedding reception. Since I know I'll be heavy by this time I don't want to commute from my house to KL. We stayed there but end up I sleep most of day time and watch TV at night. I just attended the dinner and skip the rest. Feel soooo relaxed doing that which snap me that alamak...this is exactly the signal that I have when I about to give birth for my first 2 boys.

Then I felt that baby has hit my pelvic. You know when you sit and you feel something hard pressing your pelvic. That is a sign of the baby "drops". Followed by frequent visits to the loo and again not be able to sleep at night. Perfect combo right! I asked my regular makcik urut to come over as I feel so uncomfortable. She gave me a good full body massage and while doing her thing on my tummy I ask her how far more...very close she replied haha.

Nesting instinct start to kick in as well. I mention earlier how my room is still in a mess. Yes before this I don't really care if it's in a mess or not. Now I start to be really concern with how the room looks like. The arrangement and everything. Feeling like throwing all the unnecessary things in my room right now. Feels like dolling up the baby cot. Hurm!

My parents were about to confirm their trip to Egypt today. I quickly told them that no way they are going now! Please do not risk going and if I really have early labor, I might faint by myself here. So much dependent on my parents right. Yeah I have too. Who's going to cook for me? Unless I am allowed to eat Mc Donald, KFC or Pizza Hut during my confinement period!.

Anyway, when the time comes it will. I just have to slowly finish whatever outstanding in the office. If not, the whole team need to come over and visit me for the handover haha, instead of visiting the baby ;). Pray for me yeah for a smooth delivery. The boys outside can't wait to see the boy inside...and so do I !

Anything cheap

My dear sis in law introduce me to Pandora jewelry. The range is slightly cheaper than Tiffany and of course I get hook to it instantly. While browsing for the jewelry range, I mumble something like this...hurm the gold range is expensive. I'll wait for hubby to become partner for this range. As of now...silver range is fine with me.

Very interesting that hubby who hardly listen or can hear my soft voice can answer yes ma immediately....and I look at him with this thought in mind. Anything cheap he will says ok and automatically heard it! Huh!

Learn and adopt

I learn a lot new things in my current role and could not help to share it with hubby for our own development. For some reasons hubby will absorb it better than me and gosh I hate it when he used it against me. How you might ask?

OK we admit we are both crazy couple...same age, having similar career when we begin our life together, we have this husband and wife bonding, friends bonding (since we start our relationship as a friend) and also colleague bonding (yes we work together for quite a while). Sometime people are confuse the way we communicate can be formal, over friendly like buddy buddy or dead romantic.

Lately we play more on professional bonding role and parenting role. Depending on how we feel that day after work we usually will talk about masalah negara, sosial dan sebagainya and followed by how it impact our children and our life. There is one day we play a mentor menti role where I start giving him lecture on where is his career should be heading and what he should do and what is he lacking and yada yada....then we start buying/borrowing some leadership, motivational book. I start introducing him to some website that I learn from my current role that I think would benefit his growth. Next thing I know he start becoming my mentor by correcting my conversation and my defensive mode and my way of holding him hostage and yada yada and oh boy!!! that is how he turn it back all around me.

At night when we reach home, we then turn ourselves back as husband and wife or maybe more to loving parents as we will spend our time with the boys. We will start with how was your day today? Some days they will just become boys and says, I don't remember and some other days they will tell us non stop of what they did the whole day. We try to make it a habit for them to update us what they do as it is important that it will be part of their nature to update us until they are big later. This followed by dinner with 4 of us on the table sometimes join by my parents. Fawwaz now can feed himself well with his hand....(owh bebudak ni mengada btw dulu tak pandai makan pakai tangan) and we make sure that it's a tradition that all of us need to have at least one meals together in one day. We then clean up our own plates, which is good thing that without bibik now the kids are more responsible with their own mess and make some effort to help each other on the house chores. Then we drive back home, snuggling on my bed either reading story book or watching youtube. Yeah the latest craze for now is watching science experiment from the youtube.

I love this part of my life as well despite the hectic life that we are having now. One thing that I realize how do we value each other in our family and make our life more rewarding is that when our routine change, we adapt to it. How difficult life going to be, it will not take away our happiness from us. We have time that we can travel as much as we want....they are time that we have those extra to splurge on what we want, time that we feel like we are on top of the world, time that we feel work sucks and draining our energy. Time that we are free to do what we want and time that we are constraint by all other responsibilities around us. Any situation that we face we stick together as a family and try to make it work. Look for option and solutions to make our life meaningful and I guess that is the key of our happiness.

I'll have to ask hubby later if he agree with this ;)

Love

I just realize that it has been a while that I did not use my problem solving skills, communication, thinking and etc. Since I came back a while ago my work is mainly development work and not much interaction with people. The things that I need to resolve for my development work also is very specific to the system. Very2 technical and straight forward. 2 years in that organization that I really feel burnt out and hence the change in my career. So far I did not regret.

9 more weeks to go before the new addition in my family will pop!. For some reasons I feel so close with my kids now. So in love with hubby. Sometime when I close my eyes I remembered how we met and how that we suddenly get close to each other and decided to get married. It was quick and spontaneous. Poor hubby as now he is so tired as he has to do most of the house chores. For me, anytime that I get a chance at home I will try to rest and sleep.

Aariz is a sweet boy as usual. So helpful and concern about me. Though sometimes he does complaint, but I will give him reasons that he finally just nodded and help me anyway. I know I am a bit harsh to him at time. Example the other day when he spilled a full cup of slurpee in my car. I could not help yelling and punish him for that. I know it is not his intention. We are suppose to meet up with his favorite cousins and it has been a long day for me. So my punishment is for all of us not to go for dinner with them. He was so upset and quiet in the car. Almost crying too until I take a deep breath and ask hubby to take him out for a walk and tell him what mistake he has done. By the way it is not entirely his fault. Hubby was suppose to buy us some drink at 7E and Aariz took the slurpee cup by himself. Hubby allow him to have the slurpee in the car and that is where the accident occur. I am pretty careful on what the kids should get from the shop and what they can have in the car. So by getting them both out from the car for a walk and reflect what went wrong give me time to cool down and also give them time to think about what went wrong. Anyway we all went for the dinner after everybody come back to their sense.

As for Fawwaz, he have this major love hate relationship with me. That everything I do will irk him. And everything he do will irk me too. We ended up enjoying annoying each other and make each other mad at the end of the day. Of course this get into Aariz and hubby attention as well. Keep on asking what's wrong with both of us as we are so loud especially when Fawwaz start to throw tantrum!. Or even me haha! But then just before we get to sleep or when he wakes up in the morning, we will just snuggle with each other.

But both of them has change to become more responsible and independent. It's like a preparation to welcome the new family member. As for me, I will enjoy every moment of their growth and milestone.

I'm in a love mode! Feel loved by my family and have so much love to pour back to them. So excuse me for this post....which has all the lovey mode element :)

Huge and Round

I am huge and round that is what I think. Hubby said I looks ok…but hubby being hubby la kan. If I asked hubby what he think about me now being round and not proportionate, then he will replied, you are pregnant dear. Then I continue, if I stay this way and not to come back to my initial shape…then he will reply it’s ok dear…hurm sounds convincing but I wonder 

Anyway I am entering my 31st week which means they are 9 weeks more to go. In that 9 weeks time I have to complete my timeline and also the handover. I have a mock up session to handle by December and a few more other stuff to look at. Time is running out.

Then back at home I still have maid issue. The local maid that I manage to hire apparently has some attitude issue that I could not tolerate. I guess she is too young as I have the same attitude issue with the foreign maid back 6 years ago due to the age. Now I am waiting for the replacement.

Then my first child is entering primary school and we have settled at least his school uniform. Outstanding is the school shoes, then stationeries, books, etc. By the way we enroll him to the swimming class since mid this year. And as of now he can swim properly as what the instructor commented. I am so proud of him even though I have not seen him swimming for a while. Usually I send him and accompany him but due to my heavy tummy I let hubby do the job. He is now in advance class and I am planning to send little Fawwaz next year to join his brother. But of course in the beginner class 

Then finally is about the little baby that is own his way to see the world. The whole family is excited now. You see at night when I was lying down (well I barely can do anything at home now) and the kids all sits next to me, some time they will as questions. Like the other day they were trying to suggest some name for the baby. It started with some funny names that I told them that if they keep on giving funny name, I will give the funny them to them and have their name for the baby. Then only they decide to be serious: p. We have fun naming the baby inside while each of them taking turn touching my tummy and argue why do we like or dislike the name. Finally that night we agree on one name which I shall not reveal yet. So the kids has started calling the baby with they name that we agree. I am not sure if I will still decide to use that name when the baby is born later. We shall see.

Some other night we just talk about the arrangement about the new baby arrival. Like where he should sleeps and how should we taking turn of changing his diaper and feeding him. It was fun as they are all excited and would want to cooperate with me on the arrival of the new family members.

So you know…despite the work is piling, the maid issue and time is running out for all deliverables by January. The life with the family just balance out everything. And again for that, I thank God.

The roller coaster life of mine

Last year I really thought that this year will be the year of restructuring our finances and life. By next year our life should be stabiles. Kita hanya merancang tapi Tuhan yg menentukan right!
It happens life is not as simple as that! The more we plan the more things we realize and the more challenge that we have to face. One point we felt that we already on top of everything, but when we explore more then we realize how small we are. To get to the next point is to transform ourselves and we have to do it quick. Clock is ticking.
Well no point to dwell on that in details pun kan, as the vision is still blur on the direction for the next few years. But plan A, B and C is already there. To execute which one tu yg kita hanya merancang but final says is always from God.
On the pregnancy, I went for a check up yesterday since I am not well too. I refuse to say I am not well actually, I mean pregnant lady it is normal to be a little bit dizzy and of course all other symptom that some of the unlucky one will have that can impact your productivity for the day. So yesterday check went well. Baby is growing as per expected. Mom gain weight of 10kgs from her initial weight….I has an infection that should be cleared by taking an antibiotic. Since I have a history of high sugar during last pregnancy, doctor suggested that I monitor my blood sugar every week from now. Other than that, we are good!.
I note that during each of my pregnancy, I am always in a peak of my career. The busyness I mean. I do not get pregnant when I am lady in leisure, or when I can work from home, or when I can have my own sweet time doing stuff. Aariz I get pregnant when I join a consulting firm and expected to take a role which is not my bread and butter. I have to work late; I have to digest new information, be pro-active and is not a pregnancy that I can take a 5 mins naps in between even though I am drop dead tired. When I am having Fawwaz, we were in Miri project assignment. The work is manageable but we are traveling pro and fro from Miri to KL almost every week. Frequent flyer during pregnancy it’s so tiring especially when the flight is delayed every other week. Then this pregnancy, even I manage to get a month break, then I start with a new job when I am about to enter the third trimester. Though I like the job, I have to admit it’s also tiring when I have to pick up new skills due to change of career, a lot of talking and and also the work require lot’s of traveling although just in KL area. Mengah makcik tau!
But besides all that I do really enjoy the challenge as somewhat I believe it impact our kids big time haha. When I look at them now, how persistent they are, they are determination and communication skills. Selalu terasa ni mesti pembawakkan budak masa I pregnant. This time round I am lucky to have the opportunity to listen to the speech and meet up with some of the prominent figures in the corporate world. Wondering how my third one will turn out to be.

This morning I had an intelligent chat with hubby discussing about people, the firm, the corporate world, strategic item and etc. Then I realize that Aariz is listening attentively in the car dengan mulut ternganga. Trying to digest ke apa I tak sure. But when we drop them at my parent’s house, Aariz suddenly give me a big kiss. Then I walk out from the car and give him a big hug. He then said, Ma you and papa work hard ok so that we can build our big house. Then he happily walks into the house. I wonder if he is fascinate/appreciate by our discussion in the car or what. But that give me a boost to work and at the same time thinking how great it is if I can stay at home back with them :)

The Local Maid

We hold first the review of the hotel that we went. It’s lovely btw….and of course mak buyong enjoy the food fiesta from day till the very last day. Sampai rumah that night…makan indo mie sebab malas nak keluar dah and penat. Ending pada makan2 yg sgt tak best kan? Hurm L

Anyway I just want to share with you about the local maid that I have been raving around here a while ago. I’ve got mine yesterday. Too early to tell but hey…I’ve been waiting for a long time that I feel like sharing my feeling right now.

I am still not sure about how am I going to handle the local maid. Mine is young…around 22 years old, but has experience teaching in taska for 4 years and don’t mind doing housework. Well my criteria always someone who can do housework and also taking care of my child once a while since my parents is at home. No joke, she needs to do quite a bit of housework. What complicate more is that since during day she’s at my parents home, she need to do major housework there and when we bring her back home at our house, she need to do some minor housework like managing our clothing and little bit of cleaning. To be precise taking care of 2 houses is my major concern cause I know is kind a bit tiring to do that. Hence I don’t mind of paying a little bit premium.

We of course are trying hard to justify our choice of having a local maid. As you know the monthly is not cheap compared to foreign maid. But then I keep on reminding myself about the pro and cons. How foreign maid is if we go via agent can cost you from 5k to 7k. Not to mention about most of them has a hidden agenda when coming down here. And what if they run away? What happen to my deposit of 7k?

They are time where my parents might be away for a trip or balik kampong and the thought of having a foreign maid to watch over my 2 kids and maybe my baby later give me a second thought as well. Always the question mark is their cleanliness and though we can teach them but sometime it took us forever to get them to understand our level of cleanliness. The IQ level is also questionable sometime, if purely taking care of housework we can discount on that. But when communicating with the kids and the values that they show is another thing to consider.

It is too early to tell. I have to experience this first and let you guys know about the pro and the cons of having local maid later. However this already takes some of the burden from me. Now I can concentrate on baby preparation, aariz school preparation, hubby can go for his job hunting ( hi dear ;) ), and hopefully things will be smooth for us. Insya Allah.

Note: for those who interested to explore more on this you can go to http://sites.google.com/site/pembantuanda2/

Road trip to Penang...again :)

We are heading to Penang….again! Why we love this place so much? I don’t know. Maybe the food and the hotel…it’s just a good combo. Our idea lately for vacation is not to look around places. Especially with my current state now!… The only thing I want to do is to laze around and have a good food. At the same time giving the pleasure for the kids to roam around freely and happily (of course with supervision ;))

Anyway we stayed in Park Royal several time and I find that the hotel is a bit old but clean. The pool is huge but small area for kid’s pool. However something worth to shout out loud is the breakfast!!!! The spread is wonderful with a lot of varieties. We love the most is the char kuew tiow! The best in town..I mean for hotel standard not hawker standard yah.

When Hard Rock is up and running we just have this itchiness in ourselves just to drove down there and experience it. The hotel is new and clean, the room we’ve got is hurm…new and clean :p but nothing much to shout on that. It is spacious where I can just put a comforter and let my kids’ sleeps on it. The breakfast is so so…errr actually I don’t like it at all. But really something to shout about is the kid’s pool where it is so huge and has a few sections that suits my kids well. They end up staying in the pool for the whole day and just out for lunch and that’s it. Other than that we just love the live band…. Too bad we can’t enjoy much as the kids are too sleepy by then. But they were good too.

This trip we decided to try out another hotel along there as well. Will not reveal the hotel name yet but definitely I am going to give a review on the hotel perhaps with picture. You know we do take picture but most of it resides inside our hard drive and that’s about it. Too lazy to transfer it in the blog or even facebook.

I am of course pretty excited with this trip. Is just that last night when I do my routine ‘check-in’ to the toilet then I was asking myself. What am I getting myself into? The 4 hours journey …what happen if I really need to pee or hungry haha :p. Well I guess I just have to sort that out during the journey.

Move

Everything in a mess!

How do we move in a team if no one else want to move? If only you that is willing to move?

How much do I need to sacrifise?

Do I need to abandon my dream now ?

26 weeks and counting

I am 26 weeks now. Tummy is growing and sometimes I just forgot that I'm pregnant. Yeah been running here and there, attending this and that. Drafting and planning, discussing and laughing and yeah we have to do acting and dancing too. No kidding hehe. The interesting part is that I am not stress yet. Not yet as of today but of course I am tired. Hence I forget about me being pregnant and suddenly lately my tummy start to harden, hard enough for me to notice and to be worried. Is it not too soon ?

As a precaution I take a step back and start seeing doctor. Thank God after a few test, everything shows that my pregnancy is normal and she subscribe me some medicine to reduce the frequency of hardening. Sweet enough that my concern doctor will always want to subcribe me sick leave but I am so used for not taking any. She gave me 2 days anyway but stubborn me what did I do? I still go to the office thinking about certain stuff that is still pending. Resulted that I get a massive cramping in the evening that I have to get my poor husband rushed out from an important meeting to send me home (not really rushed out as I give him 20 mins to settle things down).

In the car I get a very sharp look from my husband and of course a long lecture :p. While I try to be chatty and tahan sakit as the cramping come and go and keep on asking if he love me. What if I die, I will not let him be in peace if he marry another women. As I have invested time waiting for him to climb his career. I will come back and haunt him and so and so :p. Of course to annoy him enough until the conversation goes to the new handbag that I still didn't get up till to date hehe.

That is btw my update for my pregnancy so far. Today I feel much better resting at home while doing some housekeeping on pending item. At least I am not moving around that much so I did get my rest. Except that the second one decided not to go to his kindy when he saw me at home. Start to of course kacau me whenever he has the chance. I kinda miss staying at home :p

On the other note I get freak out to think about the year end is nearing. So many things to do. I have not start to buy anything yet for the newborn. No idea what to get either. Then by the time I have to start buying stuff for the newborn, then we have to start preparing Aariz for his primary school. Yeah I know I've been babbling about this on and on and on. But seriously help! I dont know when to start and if it's too early to start ! haha. I read some blog they are people start buying some cloth, bottles and even diapers. Here I am still not ready to buy anything yet. Help me please!

About maid

I am now actively searching for a local maid. But since it is not easy as we need to really reach out to people from kampung2 and such, I still open my option tiny option to the foreign maid. Which I learn a lot and I get really mad now. To get a foreign maid if u directly call the agent from Indonesia, they will ask you around RM4000 to RM5000 fees. And that my dear friend is not with a proper work permit or even a medical check up. I do not know how this people can have a cheek to ask for RM4000 without first the maid don't have a proper document, second they are not trained and third, their medical condition is not being checked. Imagine the disease and all other social issue that we potentially bring in to Malaysia ?

Next when I reach out from the local agent, the fees can goes up to RM6000 or even more. The more interesting part is, some of them is already in Malaysia with out a passport!. OK tell me now how on earth this people can get into Malaysia without any passport ???? The reasons I know about this is because I've got a phone call from one of the agent asking me RM1800 for the introduction fees, one month warranty and if I'm happy with her than they will proceed with passport application which require more cost. And I was like what??? How the hell are you getting this people in here without any passport. I'm so gonna make a report on this. One thing that I'm not sure if my report will be taken seriously or not. Passport is one thing than another things is their work permit and health screening. Seriously I am not sure what are we getting ourselves into.

I know I am desperate for help. But I am not desperate to sacrifise my country. Bringing in people without proper health check and not even with identification is causing a lot to our economy and social. Not to mention the price that we have to pay for this middle man. And I tell you they are arrogance because they know people are desperate. Why we let ourselves to be desperate and get ourselves into this? I am trying to be strong by not falling into any illegal transaction and also by not paying more than I think what the agent deserve to get. Though I know it's battle that is hard for me to win, but I am very sure that if all of us can resist of selling our country for a small price. This things won't happen.

Sad case that some of them who are hired ran away after the employee has put so much money and sacrifising their country. I know some of the employer even can sense that the maid is going to run away, or already have a problem and just let them be. Reasons why, argh I don't want to think about it and at least it save the cost and trouble of me sending the maid home. Please people, if you know your maid is already a trouble to your family, what can they do to the society? Imagine that because of these people overflowing our country, one day your kids might fall in love and start to get married with immigrants with lot's of social problem? Or your parents died because this people go inside your house and rob and kill your family too? Look around and be responsible to your maid. If you can't please don't start to have one. Do not terminate and not sending them back home. It is your responsibility.

I know as working parents living in this country is a bit hard. We need helper because we work more than 8 hours. Our office is far from our home and we just need to have the extra hand to look after our kids. The nursery is not efficient, the process to get maid is not siding us and 1001 more issues that we have to face. But again it is not worth to sacrifise the country. We just need to look harder for other solutions. As for me the solutions is to look for local helper. Still looking and I'll let you know if I found one.

Our Sunday

I think a while ago I lost my appetite on food and shopping. Both during my early pregnancy. Well lately it come back. And it's getting worst!

I had all this things that I like to look at, to try on and to buy! One good thing is that I am not an impulse buyer. So the damage is not that bad. But having a constant things to buy in mind from one to another is like another disease that has to go !!! As eventually you will accidently buy one or two. Like today, I bought a nice sandals for me. This one is essential because I need a nice sandal for my pregnancy ...right ? Or hurm should I maybe enjoy it while it last? Urgh damn you bad thought haha!

Anyway today we went out for late lunch. I had Bubba Gump for the first time. It was good and I enjoy the food. Right after our lunch we went out to survey the car. This is to look on our option for a compact car and being gatal we went to the showroom fronting to the Ikea/The Curve. We test drive a few car.....Nice feelings, on a cloud nine for a while, the boys (hubby and kids) are the one who enjoy the most! Imagine that the showroom is just next to the luxury car showroom. And guess what!! the kids running all the way into the showroom and start inspecting one after another. Aariz always has grown fond to the Audi brand thanks to Iron Man. And Fawwaz just love anything that looks fast and sporty.

As we tried hard to drag them out from the other showroom Aariz asked this question. How much we need to buy the Audi TT? And Fawwaz replied tiga ringgit jek bang. To the annoyed of Aariz and seeking for more a realistic answer from his dad.

Well after the test drive and getting the brochure we come back to our senses. Cars always a nice things to have. Of course when you have extra you want to upgrade and keep on and on and on upgrading. The thing is, it will never be enough. Good thing is after we test drive we know that all this can wait for now. The most important thing is first to have the baby, check out the plan for next year, we don't know yet which project hubby will be going for next year. Then the search for a MPV is one in our priority list besides a few others.

See I can go up to the sky berangan at one day, and back on my foot the next day. But berangan is a good thing at least for me. It will keep us to have a purpose to live. And just because the time is not right, it doesn't mean that we can forget about it. One day Insya Allah, it will be ours ;)

Entry menci sat!

Eiii menci kan memikirkan yg akhir tahun dah dekat. Tapi travel plan for this year mmg hampeh sesangat.

Seriously end of last year I mention that this is our recovery year. Memang betul betul recovery year lah. Everything very moderate nothing much to shout. We just live with our day to day routine (ah finally we have a routine) and enjoying our home.

Tapiii with no extravaganza travel plan it is sooooo not fun! haha! Eiii menci menci! Of course when we are entering the last quarter of 2010, means it's entering my final trimester for my pregnancy. Meansssss if I were to plan for any travel pun yg dekat2 boleh la. To risk my pregnancy is not an option. Sebab if anything happen when we are travelling far, is not just me and hubby. Sape pulak nak handle the kids kan. Karang jadi drama sebabak .....akak jugak yg susah.

OK ni sebenarnya whining post cos I try to plan for a trip in Asia but then my schedule and hubby schedule does not jive well. It has been that way since early this year. So I guess we have to put everything on hold first. Just plan somewhere near like maybe staying in a hotel in KL haha. Or PD or Melaka or Cyberjaya :p. Will see how it goes. As if I can enjoy much pun kalau travel jauh2 kan.

Tapiiiiii still nak whine jugak....menciiiiiiii sebab tak dapat pegi jalan jauh jauh!

Dear hubby, since I tak dapat pegi jalan jauh2...nape la susah sgt u nak approve I beli handbag baru ni!!!!!

My weak point!

I have all this plan of having my own sweets time with hubby. But most of the time I will just drop the programme as I can’t bear thinking or leaving the kids out of my sight except for work. Seriously I have that dilemma. Which I think is bad for me.

I am pretty particular with time spend in the office. If I don’t see a need of my presence in the office or to stay late, I will quickly pack my stuff and go off. Except that lately when I see the activities offered by my new office is kinda exciting that I don’t mind to be in the office at all haha. But my point is not during the working time, is just that if someone ask me to go somewhere after office, or to have dinner which is non office related (yes you my friend zie hehe) I will think like twice or more whether or not to spend my time doing that.

It’s a disease yes I know. Whenever that I think of having a getaway with hubby or join him for a late mamak with friends or anything that is suppose to be fun for us…I will keep on thinking about should I ? I am so obsessed to be at home with the kids even though they are now very independent and most of the time during my arrival at home they will come and scream yaiy!!! Mama dah balik…I love mama and hug me and kiss me and then puff they go elsewhere to continue what ever they’ve been doing. Most of the time they will just have fun between both of them annoying each other, and occasionally check on me and bug me once in a while. The crucial moments that they need us (me or hubby) usually, when they bath, breakfast, dinner, doing homework and 15-30 mins quality time before sleeps. I get the quality time before sleeps as I love them hugging me and kissing me and talking to me before sleeping time. The quality time when they woke up belongs to hubby.

Though I know that once in a while it’s ok to leave them at home with their grandparents but I still have to rush home to see them. How do I get rid of this feeling? Sometime when I see people who has kids and don’t mind to stay late in the office I kinda envy them. How do they get that strength to stay focus while my mind is already at home wondering what are they doing?

I think I really have to work on this. The other thing is that I am also too clingy with hubby. Hubby knows best on this. First step that I am trying to do is to take a break with hubby (will work on my too clingy with hubby later haha) by watching the Tun M musical after office one of these days and then stay in one of the hotel in KL so that we can head straight to the office the next day. See if I can get that into realization or if my heart is weak you can see me back at home and snuggle the kids who already fall asleep.

The next maybe takes a baby step to spend time for myself with my friends. We will see how it goes.

Berangan mode with my parents blessing!

Last post I mention about my never ending berangan to buy a mini cooper. I actually told my parents about it and guess what happen. They totally oppose my idea by giving a lot of not a very nice remark and 1001 of advice. Thank you very much. Grrr I just berangan ok.

I am not a very good child that is what I think but seriously when it comes to stuff of what I am going to do next in my life I always throw it to my parents to see their reaction. For some reasons when their reaction is a negative reaction I will re-evaluate my thinking and most of the time scrap it and do something else. I am not sure if that really help in my current life where Alhamdulillah everything di permudahkan Tuhan.

We had a discussion the other week a few close friends of hubby. The impromptu meet up that start at 10 pm and finish at 1.30 pm at some restaurant somewhere in Shah Alam. We talk about one thing to another and landed to a conversation about people who has so much difficulties in their life. People who are not in peace. Sometime we see people has almost everything but not in peace. We see people who always grumbling about their life and can't move on. A lot of example we see as we grow and it happens to people who are just around us. People that we know. But as we talk deep about it we can come out with one conclusions. It goes back to our relationship between us and our parents.

As much as we hate it or probably not to trust this, but blessing from parents are very important. Though probably not all of us are bless to have a wonderful parents. But how crappy they are or how screwed up they are...they are still our parents. Sometimes is best to listen rather than to talk back and try to get their sense when they are ready to talk bout it.

Like what has happened to me. I get really mad when my dad (he's from Melaka by the way so the choice of word is always unpleasant) said something like he told me once that buying mini cooper is not a wise thing to do and I'll regret with my decisions later. And a lot more talks to emphasize how bad my decisions is and start to compare with this one person that I know who didn't listen to him and buy the car of his choice and now is suffering not able to pay and thinking of selling back and da da da da. I give my reasoning and when the conversions seems doesn't goes anywhere so I stop and switch the conversation.

Actually it's scare me when my parents star to talk like that as I take it like a doa and I hate it when I have to live and keep on thinking of it. That's how bad it is. Few days after that I guess the sense is coming back and they start to talk to me nicely. This time the conversation is more in well manner as they put their reasonings and I put mine and then start to look at other options like what car between my budget that I should buy if I still want to have that feeling of driving small sporty car at this age. The conversation last for an hour or so and then I get back to hubby and start to think about our options.

Darn now my just berangan things has get one step further. But this time with blessings and of course on top of that we have to look at our capacity. The verdict! It will still be my berangan mode cos I am one crazy woman to change car when I am pregnant and also still on probation with my new job. But this time I can berangan in peace.

Never ending berangan mode

I will definitely blog less and lesser these days. Penat lah. Is either I'm working or I'm sleeping haha. But other than that everything is all good. Raya been good though I get quite a few negative story. Try to push it away from me now cos too many rather than jadi pengajaran it become something that haunted my mind pulak kan. I get easily irritated with hubby lately. You see that is why I don't like working with him! Now travelling together with him everyday pun dah get into my nerve. Suke make annoying remark and get me irritated ...eiiiii geram!

On the other note my berangan mode is back. Ok do not speculate anything yet ok I just want to berangan and let me berangan peacefully. We are looking for a second hand mpv to accomodate our expanding family. Of course I was thinking about something big and comfy and nice and perhaps a little luxury. But wahhhh the price pun bukan main lagi mahal la kan. Most of them valued at 100k and above and the thing is the feeling inside the mpv is not that great pun. Some looks old and dusty....Of course if you want something that's really nice than the price can go from 180 k and above. Which way beyond my budget. Come to think back since I'm travelling far to KL driving a mpv is not a good option either. Waste of fuel and also not to mention the size of the vehicle is too big. Very likely we will just leave the mpv back at my mom's house and for us to use only during weekend when the whole family is around for outing. So why opt for an expensive mpv? Then we scale down and now looking at Nissan Serena or Exora. Which hubby has develop a great passion to Serena thanks to his frugal chinese colleague !

Anyway this is where my berangan mode start. Since Serena might not cost us a lot as we are thinking to buy a second hand mpv. Why not I get the car of my dream....Well I develop a passion for a nice and chic car since I was young. Blame that on my dad ;). So I told hubby about it. I need a chic car if u buy a bulky mpv. Imagine driving into KL with a small and chic car, the fuel saving, space yada yada.....Then I told him I want a mini cooper! Haha ! Instilling the idea on his head since yesterday and now we are looking for a test drive. I've been in the car once and it's an amazing experience. Well again I like to berangan, and this is my current angan2. Let me berangan with peace ok. So that I can smile and be in the cloud nine until reality strike again :p

Nightmare

Raya sakan…hurm that’s might explain why is the long silence la kan. But seriously I love my Hari Raya now like all other Hari Raya in my life. The same old story the same old routine plus minus the joy of seeing my kids growing up understanding Ramadhan and the Eid celebration, then having my grandma as part of our raya routine and also some catch up and update from relatives that make us owh and aaaaahhh. Interesting each time!

Anyway there’s a particular stuff that disturb me on this Hari Raya. Hubby told me on the second Hari Raya during our way back from Sabak Bernam to our home. I can’t describe much here cos it might be sensitive towards some. But one point I can give here is not to ride on other people’s dream. Especially my dream with my husband! It gives me a nightmare, like a Freddy Krueger nightmare.

I always blog about the plan that we always talk about with my husband, about our future and how are we going to structure our life. All dreams that we have about our family, the dream house, the education for our children, the financial, the travel plan, the plan of taking care of our parents one day and a lot more. And those are my dreams with him, my husband and our dreams are align. We have to make sure our dreams are align as we have to work together to achieve that. When we plan and we dream we also must make sure that it must be realistic, achievable and not to mention that we do not interfere with other people’s life or dream!

I really wish I can spill in details on what is the thing that disturb me even though hubby assured me that we are in control. Even though if they are sentimental value being brought up on this issue we can always let go that dream and pursue to another. But what disturb me is that everybody has been given a chance once to get that thing or to share the load but everybody back off. And when we pick it up and start to incorporate that as part of our dream we had a lot of this bad talk and unnecessary advice that we don’t. We carry on as we have faith in our plan. We invest a lot of money and we have to tighten our budget for more than a year just to get it done. And once everything is fine, and good they are people thought that they can just propose of something to interfere on what we have worked on! Shame shame. It makes me pissed off and it haunted me though again hubby will keep on reminding me that we are in control. I just hate the fact that the other party might already start dreaming and planning on how to screw my dream and plan. This particular party has always had a dream of doing something and tries to get everybody to involve with their dream. But all this while those are just talks and it is not realistic and it does not directly intended to us so I can just listen with one ears and flush it out later. But this particular dream or maybe I can say plan!!! Is directly impacting us!

I am not happy and I can’t share my unhappiness with others cos it’s kinda sensitive. The only person I can spill this out is to hubby and he has been listening to all my whining and reasoning for the past few days. I told him that he should not tell me at the first place as it will screw my mind. And to fix this….better he get me a new hand bag :p

Pineapple tart, other stuff and Hari Raya

Do you know how difficult it is to get a nice pineapple tart nowadays? Well at least for me…it’s damn hard. Blame to my grandmother who make a delicious tart during my childhood. Lucky for me as I have grandmother and also a mother that is good in cooking and my grandmother particularly in baking as well. But to learn those skills from them is really hard. If I ask like how to cook this and how to cook that the only thing that I get is a stare and the answer will be just campak campak jekla….agak2 how much you need to put. So not like google where the recipe will give you the exact measures, this pro will not sit down and write down the recipe for you. The only way to learn is to observe them in the kitchen. And I am too lazy to do that.

Put aside my mother as some of her cooking secret is already with me. Ehem I am a natural cook as well ;) but long way to learn all other tedious cooking. Like my mom’s sambal be it to put on fish or chicken with or without belacan….her sambal always good! The rendang and her masak kicap…ok her masak kicap is very unique though and few other cooking lesson that I have to pick from her.

Now about my grandmother…. She’s a keeper, meanings she will not easily share her secret recipe with people including her own blood like us. Her cooking were so good that we are spoilt by it. Her main expertise was sambal udang belimbing, masak lemak any, asam pedas any, …ok the reasons why I don’t eat asam pedas elsewhere except home cook, curry the best and few others. For curry I manage to observe and now sort of know how to cook the curry as up to her standard. But for the rest….I need to stay in the kitchen more to learn.

Lately for some reasons when I do my own cooking, which is western food like chicken pie and few others, she will observe me and come near to look at my work. She’ll start to chat a little bit with me (yeah she didn’t chat much with us pun) asking about what I’m doing and then share some of her experience. Then slowly she offered me to do her famous pineapple tart with me. I am so thrilled that I am ok with that even I don’t have much time to spare already since I start working. So last week we start the project and I get to witness and also write her secret ingredients. The verdict….we’ve ordered a few tart for various source, I think we going to abandon those tart already haha. Not really abandon lah …sound very mean kan! But that will be served to the visitors. While homemade tart, will stay with us. Even my dad was busy eating the tart and we almost emptied one whole jar.

Then I try my luck asking her to teach me some of her other specialties. Which is popiah basah….They said it is the best popiah basah in Melaka or something as my grandma use to sell kuih. And lucky me she said yes…So another project will commence next week during raya week to make some popiah basah to welcome some of the cousins and relative to our home. I just hope and pray that she is in a good mood to be able to teach me rather than change her mind later. You see this particular recipe has been asked by many since years ago and she keep on shush them away. Including my own cousins…So when I was about to ask her, everyone especially my aunty and parents have a big doubt on that. Now as she changes her mind, this are my chance to learn and hopefully the goodness of her cooking will not die with her. So much to learn and so little time I have, but better late then never right?

Well that’s my story for today….my head is really into raya mode already. Since grandma is now staying with us, that means all our relatives will drop by to our house to visit her. It will not be the first few days of raya as my relatives from my dad side are all from far away. Expecting the week after next to be super duper busy for us. Nonetheless the first day raya still meriah at our side. The plus of staying in kampong where the tradition is still intact. Our neighbors has regards my family as their relatives so we will join them on visiting from one house to another around our area. They will also come and visit us. So food preparation is still important in our checklist (always important).

I think for me the spirit of raya is always being around the family, the food preparation and presentations and the visiting part. That makes the most of my Eid Celebration. Happy Hari Raya you all and Maaf Zahir Batin!

A little bit of this and that

Sooooo many to update. Don't know which one to write first. Many important things happening in my life right now. I don't even have much time to relax and take my usual nap. Some days I just like la a zombie to go through the day...But overall life never been so full filling like right now.

These is what has happened since last update that I wrote (a week ago?). First the last minute buka puasa event together with Fawwaz mini birthday celebration. It's a success....everything is last minute, the menu the attendance list, the door gift, the birthday cake. But everything went well. The birthday boy having his first birthday celeb with a pool of kids knowing what they have to do already...They all give ways to the birthday boy, together sing the song and clap out loud once the birthday boys blow the candle....All done by themselves with minimal supervision....Imagine kids around 6 years and below knows the routine already haha...Seems that we have too many birthday party throughout the years that they all comfortable with the routine already. The adults all busy stuffing themselves and play catch up on the latest update and everybody is having a good time. Food is all enough to feed everyone of us and no wastage! (except for the rice and serawa durian). Small door gift idea and sponsored by my little sister was a small fish (alive!) to be given for the little guest. The kids were thrilled and so do we.

Then the day before we were busy shopping electrical stuff from Ikano. We are gadget freak... which is including the home appliance not only the IT stuff. We get ourselves a microwave, karcher steamer which hubby love so much as he can now mopped the whole house in just a minute. On top of that we get some windfall that we decided to get ourselves the steamer iron. Both of us grinning the whole day and my oh my how the tools has helped us to clean up after the open house.

On top of that I get myself busy to bake cookies for raya, chicken pie, learning how to make a bolognese from scratch (which I have a lot more to improve I think) and that has taken a lot of my time lately. I made a choc chip cookies (secret recipe from my sil), cornflakes cookies ( google) and also pineapple tart (my grandma secret recipe). Time to puji diri sendiri...home made cookies always taste good! I guess cos we use the best ingredients and made with love. My resistance of spending time baking also has improve...last time I don't have much patience to mold the cookies and bake which sometime can take hours....but now ...things has change and I am ready to bake :). Oh I thing to note....I understand myself now...I can bake for fun but not for sale though. I don't have enough patience for that haha.

Then the other highlight is, I have start working with my new company!!!! To be honest I am so thrilled!!! Tapi penatnya jgn ckp la...Not that I have start working like hell ke apa. But since I've been staying at home for a while I use to take a nap in the morning and afternoon. You can imagine how sleepy am I during that time. Not to mention that the office is pretty cold and I am fasting, I swear I am hungry to the max by the end of the day dengan bulu roma meremang2 tahan kesejukkan. Other than that everything seems fine to me. Ada kemaruk and jakun sket sebab now I have easy access for shopping, fine dining, all treatment like massage, saloon all around me. Last time I have to schedule for all this to happen. But now I can do any of above anytime after office. Isn't that dangerous. Hubby already warn me to be extra careful. Well I'm sure I will ( I hope :D). Another thing that I am so jakun is to have my own desk. Yes I am so jakun on that. I've been so use to be nomad, moving from one location to another due to my nature of my previous job. It's hard to have your own desk so basically nothing much you can do with your own work space. Sometime you don't even have your own work space. So sad you see. Now I have my own work space, my own cabinet and drawer...and I am sooo loving it. Gonna print some of my kiddos picture to be put on my desk later. Bring over my favorite mug and few other stuff to make me comfortable to be in the office and ehem...since maybe I have to stay a little bit late in the office I'd better make myself comfortable right!

Last but not least, we went for our monthly medical check up knowing that this time for sure I am going to know the gender of my baby. Again we all are sooooooo thrilled to be in the doctor office and when she scanned and tell us the results, guess who's the happiest person in the world!! Both Aariz and Fawwaz. Cos now they will have another brother to share their passion on cycling, riding bike, fighting etc. Yes it's going to be another boy. Which hubby turn to me and said..well we just need to try another round. And I said well will see how it goes with the 3 little boys around me haha. But syukur to God I am so happy with his gift. I am sure I can handle 3 boys if not God will not give me another right!.

Well, that's sum up on what is happening to me and my family for the past one week. Today we did some house cleaning, laundry etc and soon going out to Bangsar for a buka puasa event with a group of friends. Then will prepare for tomorrow (dah kena keje kan). Luckily raya stuff is almost done. OK lah byk dah to update...talk to you later ;)

5 hari lagi! Jeng Jeng Jeng

5 hari lagi nak start keje.....owh tidak!!!

They are still a few outstanding task in my list....like baking cookies for raya....seriously I just have 2 types for now!... so kena gigih buat kuih raya this weekend.

And of course being me...I really can't stop myself to invite people for makan2. Have not done this for quite a while and as I mentioned before, since we stayed far away from civilization. People hardly come to our house if we don't invite them. So I'm taking this opportunity to organize a small buka puasa together with mini celebration for Fawwaz's birthday. This is his first kinda formal birthday celeb...and still considered mini since it false during Ramadhan. Not much activities we can do (I mean during this holy month takkan nak huha bagai). Thinking of getting some bunga api but sigh....it's really hard to get any now. Maybe mercun pop la pun yg ada kots! As long the kids are happy I guess that's ok!

Aariz school registration almost complete except that we don't have his immunization details. Then sek agama still pending for confirmation. Fawwaz we almost certain to continue with his current kindy since he's progressing well even though he get's a lot of punishment....

Hurm apa lagi....some minor shopping and house cleaning...the minor shopping I'll gladly resume when I start working. Hai tak tau la how I can be berjimat cermat with my new office location. Owh please remind me that I need to buy balang kuih raya ya (though no kuih yet...tapi balang mesti ada)

Owh and my facial and hair salon visit haha! Will need to get that done before start working as well.

OK peeps...have a nice long weekend (for some of you ;))

The Plan

Revisiting life plan is always our favorite topic as husband and wife. We measure ourselves, our family for a 5 years plan. And it's amazing how we change as a person in that period of time. Now days besides 5 years plan we already start to look at beyond that. Reasons being well we are not getting any younger. Any plan that we want or will execute, we have to decide now. By the age of 40 or 45, the least that we want to to is to change the plan. By that time we have to settle with what we have. Doesn't means that we already give up or something...but we have to be prepared to live within our means with what we have and start to plan on how to live our life during our golden years.

The career
So lately we start the conversation again. With my change of career and new pay scale we have to do some restructuring. Hubby on the other hand is re-evaluating his career. Like me, we start to think that our SAP career is almost at the peak already. Nothing much it can offer us in terms of personal development or to fulfill our satisfaction as person. We have to love our work to love our life. That's what we believe. And at this age is either we change or we gonna stuck here forever. We have 5 years more to revisit our career and decide if this is it. After the age of 35, it's kinda hard to go for a career change anymore.. that's what base on my readings and also the opinion from my recent interview with the selection partner of my new workplace.

The education
Then we look further on our children, and family. This is where we need to have more that 5 years plan already. Where to put them on their kindergarten (which we already done that), primary school (decided) and next secondary school (few options) and finally their higher education. Well to be honest, I am totally freaking out about where should I send them to their school. With all the negatives comment of our education system and also the jinx about homeschooling or private school, well who doesn't? Or maybe just me? But anyway since we love to talk about things and I am the person who like to justify all my actions so that I am comfortable with the decisions I made. We finally put some conclusions on the long term plan. My father once advice hubby that we plan and stick to it, even financially/things change, we have to stick with the plan. So this is the plan that we sort of drafting / agree for now.

We both agree that currently sending them to a multiracial kindergarten is good for their social skills and understanding culture. I want them to understand colors are just colors and what make people difference are their heart. So far they are mixing well, pretty liberal, opinionated, and most importantly they are having a good time. I just hope that this is a good start / foundation for them to get to know the world and it's people.

Next, the decisions to stay to my parents maybe seems weird to some people. People always question why do we stay far far away from urbanization. To be honest, I don't get any visit from my in laws or friends that often unless if we formally invited, due to the reasons that we stay way back in Klang. Well I will not back off from that as this is for my kids... I want them to get the childhood that I have. The freedom of roaming around and explore stuff. So here we are. Proudly I am going to send them to the kampong primary school. Though I question myself so many time about this. But hey look at me, look at some people that I know off, they've done pretty well. I guess upbringing plays important role on their development as well. My justification to hubby on this, hey the kids need to know their roots. First they are Malays and they need to see with their eyes and feel it to be among us Malays. So that we know why we are so behind, what we can do to help or to improve, see how fortunate we are (or prob not) to be expose or to be lucky to have what we have. And also to appreciate and learn on what are some of the villagers still have. Courtesy, rendah diri, respect the elderly, sopan santun things like that. I know I have and I did, knowing my friends and be friend with them no matter how rich or how poor they are, their heart are all pure. I still hope that the values is there left for my kids to learn and experience themselves.

We had a conversation about education the other day on the quality of the teachers. Teachers who make their career now as just cari makan, to earn some money. Not passionate to mendidik anak bangsa...like before. Well I do remember that during our time some teacher are really dedicate (though they are few saiko teachers haha, I shall keep that to ourselves). But teachers who go to the extra miles to teach budak kampong on weekend for free like Cikgu Jamil. There is this one teacher (Cikgu Shikin), she is our Scout teacher advisor. Well she also goes to the extra miles, doing scout activities like cycling in the jungle (more to kebun) during weekend. Teacher Suzanna, with her English slang trying to teach budak kampong to speak in proper English, it's hilarious. But hey those teacher's exist during my time and I still hope they are pure heart teachers who love to teach the kampong kids at my former school like before. I almost certain Aariz and Fawwaz will complete his primary school here at kampong.

Looking forward for the secondary school, we know that this one we have to do something more serious about it. I have rejected the idea of sending them to the boarding school. Unless if in future they are multiracial boarding school. I want them to get back to the multiracial secondary school. The other day when we are looking for our next new home, we have considered a few places like Setia Alam or Shah Alam or even Alam Impian. As we try to look further (even with the ridiculous house price) we put a pause and start to rethink. Where should we send our kids for their secondary education? Hubby look around in Selangor and found out that school in PJ rated as no 1 and Klang rated as no 2 in the whole Selangor. So our choice to stay in Klang is already a good choice. But we also have a choice to move to PJ. After some thinking considering my MIL (that prob gonna stay with us) the other option is to prob rebuild the PJ house and move there. Though they are some debate about how the childhood for our 3rd and maybe 4th child going to be...The plan is to move there in time for Aariz to go for Secondary school. We think that by going to a multiracial school will help them to be more liberal, and can express themselves better. Hopefully with the foundation that they have (roots and religion) will guide them better facing the urban kids.

On the higher level education, I still don't have a final answer on it yet. Cos it will all depending on the children later, what they want to do /be. But we will definitely put aside for each child in case they need fund to further studies. My concept is each child has one chance of us funding their education. We are not super rich to fund each time they fail or think of changing course or anything. They need to be clear on that and they need to note that we have to give a fair chance to their other siblings. Else I am hoping that they are smart enough to apply for university and get scholarships from it. Means the extra money that I already put aside can be used up for our travel plan or maybe upgrade to a nicer car maybe :)

Of course on education it can be re-evaluate from time to time depending on our child progress. I believe each child are unique and they could face the world better than the other or maybe they need extra hand for help. I am not ruling out the possibilities of taking them out for homeschooling or private school (if they have issue with their education or prob social problem). But it would be great if the can go through the system and be strong and prove that they can pull through it. I am tempted to elaborate more on my view about private school and homeschooling but this post is already been a long post so I hold my view on that.

The financial
Of course like others we want to retire as millionaire. Or retire young retire rich...or having our financial freedom. Well we are working on it slowly and progressively. This is something that pretty hard to predict, but the base is already there. And from our career progression it will determine what sort of lifestyle we can have and how we can retire later. What my dad meant earlier about we plan our lives and stick with the plan is kinda traditional but worth to hold on. Like we already plan on where to settle down, the dream house base on our current load (and projected income/load), the education plan and so on. Stick with it even if suddenly we get a huge pay raise or something similar. Treat the extras as bonus, and spend accordingly or better keep it for later. Don't suddenly change the lifestyle due to that as we never know what's gonna happen next. Basically we are practicing that, except that sometime we also slacking here and there...(hubby can roll his eyes reading this cos most of the time I am the one who are slacking). The key is to spend one step down from our earnings, so that we are prepared if worse could happen. Like my career change now, it's a turn of 180 degrees from my freelance earning. Luckily our spending doesn't change that much from 5 years ago, except that we lock ourselves in some commitment/investment. So we turn out still OK. Looking at the brighter side, I don't have to worry about medical, get more stability, with annual leave, bonus, epf etc. This is maybe for our better future. So there goes our plan...I get a job with a better stability and hopefully hubby can climb up further in his career. We keep our spending low, invest more for child education, better life (house), travel and most importantly retirement (and maybe health insurance).

The other aspect of life
We are still planning, like our trip to travel around the world. The plan to be a philanthropist (owh how I am slacking on this)....they are many more in our plan list to fulfill our spiritual needs. Like I always wanted to bring my kids to the orphanage and to the elderly home so that they can see with their eyes people who are less fortunate. I always inspired to go to all this ceramah and learn more about my religion but duniawi still tebal kot. And the greatest plan of course is to perform Hajj by the age of 35 or at least by 40. They said if you have the capacity to go, go when are young so that you can enjoy the Hajj. All this spiritual plan on the other aspect of life are still not outline properly. Well we should spend more time to think of this pretty soon.

So far that is what I can think of about The Plan for our little family, and growing. Is something that I like to share and for me to refer if my plan is still on track. Any addendum to the plan, or will the plan change in the next few years time. Let's see.

Little something abt me and abt Aariz

It will be 11 more days before my break is over. To tell you a secret, I get bored already staying at home. That hubby told me this morning, keje salah tak keje salah !! Isk hehe.

But this is Ramadhan you see (start blaming mode), I tried to fast since I should can fast for every single day. Truly is a challenge for me. Some day I can't eat much or even throw up right after sahur. Leave me feeling super hungry the whole day and make me fatigue and tired not able to do anything. Even if ate properly during sahur, by 10 or 11 I start to get really hungry. Last night when we woke up around 4.30 pm I ask hubby if he felt hungry. Hungry in a sense that really really hungry. He look at me one kind and said no...Then I realize..ok this must be hormone of mine. The baby might need continues supply. Anyway so far I skip 2 days already as I cannot stand the hunger and keep on vomiting nothing. Some other days are fine, if I can fight I can even cook some / prepare some dishes, do some cleaning. Other than that....melepeks on my bed from morning till time nak bukak puasa...
One thing I enjoy so much is to be around with my kids. Other than that feel pretty useless especially if the whole day I end up melepeks doing nothing.

So while I end melepeks most of the days, my little hero Aariz is all energetic. Now he did not complaint on anything about fasting anymore. He skipped twice just like me. Once because during the weekend, after sahur he went for Subuh prayers with his Atok, then reach home cannot get back to sleep and end up playing bicycle till noon and by 2 pm he already lembik....We give him a break. The other time is because he's been coughing, I guess it's more on lacking of fluid. He still can't drink lot's of water like adults did at night during the earlier days...So we give another day off. Guess what he told his Atok ? Owh papa tak bagi puasa. Ceh...But every other days he's been fasting, no more complaints, very energetic, break fast and makan dengan berselera, he learned how to drink more water before went to sleep and during sahur....Everybody is proud of him! I am proud of him too.

Other than that, back to me with another 11 days to go. I try to settle a few stuff like Aariz school registration, to engage part time helper for cleaning our hse (esp after I start working), get done with my kuih raya baking!, hurm what else haha...not much actually.

Short break is always good. I recommend to all mothers to take a break in your career every few years once. I did that every 2-3 years once throughout my career. Once is before we went to NZ in 2006, once after my NZ assignment completed in 2008 and the other is now...the duration is usually a month to 2 months. It gives me the sanity where I get to relax and spend time with my kids. It times to reflect on what I have done and achieved and what more I need for my future. Most important thing, it makes me appreciate my work more and I will always start fresh missing the workforce. So you see, the break will stop you whining about the job, the boss, the task, the colleague, the guilt fr not spending time with the kids, and list can go on.

At the end of the day, what important most is your happiness. You can't keep people around you happy if you are not happy yourselves right ?

When Nenek get sick

I've got a meet up with Tan Sri today, this is for my new job...Owh not one to one by the way...it will be 1 to 20 that what I've been told. But today also my grandma who staying with us fall sick. She's been vomiting since sahur, which we suspect due to salah makan during Iftar earlier. My mom was not around as she's at kampung to look after her own mom. So my dad need to bring her to the clinic himself.

My dad without my mom around can go crazy sometime. He depends a lot on her but refuse to admit. Well I told my mom the other day that she can't blame him on that....all this while my mom was all around for him. You see my mom is someone that will sacrifice her career for my dad and the family. She still has her career as a nurse...but the further she go is as a Staff Nurse in the Medical Clinic in Klang. She decline for promotion as that will take her time (have to work shift/relocate etc). She work to fulfill her own satisfaction and to get extra pocket money. No more than that. Though I can see her envy some of her friend who become Matron and jump to the private hospital being paid high when we met them sometime. But hey, I guess her friends envy her even more. She retire early, my dad provide her car, bring her vacation around the world...and sometime on business class if he tag him on business traveling. She let my dad to climb his career and her to support him by his side.

Well now as they grow older and left with their own mom to take care off. My dad willingly took his mom to stay with him. My grandma is classic, like some other people from their generation. Let just said a little bit difficult especially when it come to food. She is a very good cook. So it's hard to satisfy her taste bud. At this age (80+) with diabetic, high blood pressure and a lot more, she will only follow her taste bud. Hence sometime when it's beyond control, she can fall sick. Like today. And it can be pretty bad due to her age. As she vomit pretty severe today, and since my dad alone and luckily I am still have my day off, and again we are now have no bibik around well all of us including hubby and my sister has to take part to help out a bit.

There is one system that is automatically generated between myself and my siblings though we are not very close (yes my family has problem expressing love, we all fall under category of tough love) to be responsible at a situation especially when my parents not around or either one of them not around. If both of them are around we lived like a King...ok don't blame us blame them for pampering us :D. Anyway we divided our task for the day like myself have to get some food for my grandma after sending the kids to school (bubur McD - she don't eat anyone else punya masakan except my mom that how difficult she is in term of food. But fast food is ok with her :D). Then have to arrange how am I going to leave the boys at home or not to leave them at home as I need to head to KLCC by 3 pm today. Without bibik I can't just leave them at home especially when my grandma is sick and don't know if my Dad can cope with my 2 kids and his ill mother at the same time. So my sister need to go back early to take over while I'm out for the meet up. The same happened when they are relative who passed away last time and my parent were out of the countries. Automatically all my siblings went back to my mom house and everybody pack some necessary stuff and off we go back to kampung to represent our parents. Well again that spontaneous action will only happened if my parents not around. That is one of many other important things that my parents has successfully thought us. Responsibilities and to be there for our parents.

Why I blog about this. Simply because I am touched to see how my parents take care of their parents and how I feel the same way about protecting my own parents. Nowadays, I don't see that much. I feel very irritated when I see people who just don't respect their parents (although how difficult they are) and how they complaint about their parents even though their parents has pour all their money, blood and sweat to them. Just because when the child embrace their own life, their freedom they felt their parents are just a burden. Come on, remember when we have our own child how patient we are taking care of them. And what do you feel if they treat you like you treat your parents now? Well enough said I am sure that many of us also still have good sense to our parents. Not to deny that sometimes they can drove us crazy as well...But don't that what parents does best ?

Alamak!

Something just alarm me this morning! Owh no...I have not yet complete my yearly vacation yet! With me ballooning and soon to start with my new career which I don't know if I have time (or do I have enough leave) to take a week off by end of this year....wow everything looks so messed up to me. I don't want to miss this. Yeah yeah...it always next year or year after next....but I'm having a baby remember? It takes a while before I can really travel with an infant...Not to mention that Aariz already start his primary school, which mean my travel plan will revolve around his school holiday (or maybe not if I decided that he need to take personal school break :D). OK maybe I'll just start surfing around the flight tix to see if anything can fit me in this near future....No not this fasting month...but maybe right after ?

Ramadhan update

Staying at home mode malas nak update lagi teruk ;)

Anyway since day 1 of fasting I've been drooling and thinking about menu of the day. Not that I'm doing the cooking ...my mom does...but I will sibuk2 asking what and add in one or 2 stuff that I like to have. Like day 1 is begedil...I made it from scratch! Day 2 I am flat like nobody business not sure why... maybe because I went out for a quick facial and the heat just weaken my already weak body. So I did not help much but keep on asking what is the menu for today...Day 3 which is today, my energy just kick back...and I am thinking to make roti john and chicken pie...chicken pie can be frozen and not necessarily to be eaten today... Since I'm making chicken pie, I might just boil some spaghetti to make carbonara for my kids.

Speaking of my kids. Aariz started to fast for the first time this year. Not too bad for beginner as he made it for 2 days in a row already. Though they are few funny things happened in between. Like day 1 after coming back from his kindy, he complaint about his stomach growling. I ask him how often? He told me maybe around 10 times already. Then I replied, it must be the worm inside your tummy asking for some food. Then he close his mouth with his hand and whisper to himself (like his voice going into his body) and says..."worm I'm sorry, no food for you yet. have to wait ya"....haha my mom and I was laughing out loud looking at his innocent face. But that just once he complaint...then he fall asleep, wake up around 4, go the mosque with Atok and play around the house.

Second day he start to get cheeky. I was not at home that time. But I heard that my grandma (his moyang) were screaming at him (well not scolding...it just people from Melaka they speak at the highest pitch the have). Anyway what has happened :

Moyang : Aariz tak puasa eh ? (Moyang caught him taking out bread and nutella
Aariz : Puasa lah ....ni nak siapkan utk malam nanti (that time just 3 pm btw)
Moyang : Kalau buat sekarang bersemut la diaaaaa....dah simpan simpan.... (imagine my grandma were saying this out loud haha)

Well then after I reach home ask him to sleep but he wants to play...during Asar he went to the mosque with his Atuk and they are tahlil held there. He get to bring back a small box of fried mee. At home he write his name on the box and warn everybody not to eat his mee. That is for his break fast today. Fawwaz was very pissed as he thought Atok only bought for Abang not for him...as they both are fan of any kind of mee. Then Atok bring them both to a shop nearby to buy some ice cream...to Abang kindness, he open up the ice cream to give to Fawwaz...but of course this time nenek pulak terjerit2 kan...and Aariz was quite mad cos he just try to help Fawwaz :D. Fawwaz on the other hand get to Abang nerve by drinking the vitagen one by one...till only left one bottle inside the fridge. So Aariz hide it somewhere behind. By the time we break fast...he start by eating his mee (and share some with Fawwaz of course), followed by secretly went to the fridge to drink up his vitagen (so that Fawwaz didn't see him and ask to share), then took out his ice cream and eat by himself at the hall. When I check on him, he already terbaring kekenyangan...I find it cute and I'm pretty proud of him.

I'm not sure how is he doing today...but he ate a lot during sahur too....that's why I think he can pull it through. But if he really can't we can still give him allowance....he still small I think. And as Atok saids, don't take out the fun from him as later he will think that it some kind of force things to do. As of now I can see that he actually do have some fun! and with lot's of encouragement from people around he felt important and proud too.

Where I have been missing ?

I'm still here :). taking time off from computer/tv but still connected with my BB. Actively updating my FB status and that's about it. Going out for makan2 with friends, relatives and family before Ramadhan... settling our bibik departure..(yes we are bibikless now)... then due to my lazyness to go out and shop during Ramadhan, I settle the kenit's and papa's baju raya...siap songkok bagai...kasut raya also settle for the kenits...siap dah rasmikan lagi... what else eh?

A lot going on actually but as for me.....I am enjoying staying at home since 31st July few weeks ago. Waking up late, have a nap throughout the day (if I'm not out settling errands), having my me time and also spending lot's of time with the kids!. Boy how much I appreciate this short break!

Why is it a short break...Well my fate is on a roller coaster ride since a few months ago. I was applying this one job (and another actually but that one very slim chance) for a change in career. There is no promises that I'll get the job as...it is something different but really interest me!. I know I am good at what I am doing now, but the job no longer give me the satisfaction I need. I need something that I can work on not just to give me the extra money every other month but also to fulfill my soul.

After a few years of deciding whether yes or no to leave my current job with my current skill (which I do get extension of my contract for another one and the half year but I decline), and also a new two offer to continue my contract in a different area at the very last week of my service. Politely I decline it too. I decline with a trust on my heart that I have to do something with my life. Is either I change my career rather than whine every single day to my hubby and feel miserable for doing something that I don't have heart with or stay at home and take care of the kids. Eventually I might get boring and will come back to the workforce in the same area maybe if I can't change my career but I do need this break. So I handed over my termination of contract one month earlier than my contract end. Bold move I know and financially we are not broke but! we have to live within our means.

Now after a few months of interviews and follow up, I finally manage to secure a yes from the job that I am applying since last April or May (this is even I know that I am pregnant :D). No offer letter yet...so things may turn around but I keep my faith that rezeki is from God. Else I'll be taking a year break..6 months to spend with my 2 boys before the arrival of the newborn and the other 6 months to be with the newborn, fully breastfeed maybe and of course spend time with my 2 boys as well. Either way I keep my mind open that whatever happen is for the best for our future.

As of now, for my short break. I need to help out my mom a little bit as we don't have bibik around, just some helper to help out twice a week to clean her house. So I am commuting from my house to her house every day to check out things (well actually I get my lunch and dinner there and for this whole fasting month we are going to break fast at her house). I'm blaming on hormone (again) as I still can't stand the smell of the cooking. But my big plan is to make my own raya cookies! So far I just ordered 2 type of raya cookies...so the rest is either home made...or you guys will be coming to our house to have those 2 cookies haha. Wish me luck ;)

Bile tuan punya blog....

tak boleh respond dalam comment box sendiri...

sorry peeps tak tau kenapa when i try to respond comment dalam comment box tu jadi hang. adakah sebab try comment dari office ? haih!

'Bird' penyek ?

Aariz cousins just went for circumcised last school holiday. So after a while they went for a play date together last weekend.

Today at home he brought the ‘sunat’ subject. As usual (very meannnnn parents) like to scare him by saying that the ‘tok mudim’ will cut the whole ‘bird’. I know it’s not nice...Fawwaz is screaming saying that “Heyyyy later how are we going to pee!!! If I cannot pee than you know”, threatening me back haha. While Aariz look at me and says “No la ma, they will not chop the whole ‘bird’, just the tip of it and it will become ‘penyek’. Then I ask how you know?. He replied “The other day Akil (his cousins) show me his ‘bird’ after ‘sunat’ and I show him my ‘bird’ before sunat. His ‘bird’ is penyek”. Nak pengsan mak dengarkannya!.....And of course I get alarmed and told him don’t ever show his penis to people and not to see others as well!...But his argument is to see what is the difference.

After sending them both to their kindy I immediately call my husband told him about the conversation. He said well it is normal for boys to have this kind of conversation and I was like huhhhh!!!??. Then he continue at least Aariz shared things with me...And I wonder what else that this cheeky boy haven’t shared with me.

Anyway mommies out there ...is this normal?

Being a mom

Having a good conversation with my uni mate. Catching up about live and stuff.

For some reasons I forgot that her son is already in Primary 1. And we are talking about our kids that is growing becoming independent and less and less dependent on us.

Like mine, I already start to train him on most of the stuff that he need to be independent with. Like feeding himself, taking care of his hygiene, taking care of his own stuff, peeing (several technique if you must know), and finally washing his own poo. The last one came in a little bit later actually as he cannot digest the idea of washing his own you know what and afraid of getting that sticky smelly things on his hand. But one fine day ( I guess this have to thank my mom and bibik) as he went to the toilet to do his big business, and when I check on him if he finish he ask me to go away. Proudly he claim that he can wash his own. I took a peek to see if he can really clean it up to my standard. Well enough said if half bottle of the soap is finished (mama exaggerating) and looking on how hard he try to sental you know what...ok la...it’s up to my standard then.

Well back to my conversation with my friend earlier I express about how worried I am on Aariz going to Primary 1 later. What if that and what if this. Then she said they just going to be fine. Seems that usually the mother will be worried sick but the kids will probably enjoy their school.
But unfortunately we can’t continue our conversation much after that. She need to pick up her sons. She claims if she’s late than later the kids will be wondering around ...hard for her to find him. Which I told her...well if that happen I’m sure the mom will be the one who will be crying, while the kids maybe just happily playing somewhere inside the school haha.

Well that’s the price of being a mother right. Keep on worrying about our kids. No wonder my mom are like that ! :D

Owh no!

I had this conversation with hubby last night. To have a TV in our room. I am not a fan of TV that much but during pregnancy it helps me a lot to get me to sleep. Yes! TV before I sleep.
It is the same for my other 2 pregnancy. Having TV relax me down and sort of kill some time before I go to bed. And yeah I need specifically TV with Astro so that I can flip around. Not so much of watching it actually just to get myself tired. DVD doesn’t work for me.

Hubby on the other hand keep on mentioning about the extra wiring that he had to do and I keep on reminding him that I REALLY NEED THAT :p or else we will be camping at the living hall. At least for the next 6 months.

Next project is to get new air conditioner for my room at my mom’s hse. The one that we having now is broken. Then to get new cabinet for the new arrival. Current cabinet already full with my 2 boys clothing and don’t know what else. I probably going to spend most of my time at my mom’s house esp during Ramadhan and also during confinement so need to get all ready and set to go for both mine and mom’s house.

The list start to get longer... My mom already suggested to us to make the extra room at my house as baby room. I still think that at least for the first 6 months the baby should stay with us in our room so I don’t want to spend on that yet. But will see.

And the best part even I have been thinking about what to buy and what to do I am still in my lazy mode. I can’t stand more than half an hour to be in a shopping mall so how am I going to start shopping ? Don’t even start with raya preparation...I think I will just pass some money to my sister or my mom to buy my boys baju raya.

Owh the time that I get all the excuses to shop and be in shopping mall is the time when I can’t even stand to be in the mall itself. How lame is that!

Melon

There is melon on my tummy hehe!

It is round and moving - berombak ombak! Hubby gets excited looking at my tummy and the kids....they were amaze for 5 sec then kiss the tummy then next busy playing and ignore me.

Anyway I have 9 more days to go. The job is ramping down....few documentation to do...Arghhh don't we hate documentation.

K lah later...after 3 posting yesterday I don't have much idea to blog for today.

Young chap, spoilt brat

The other day we are talking about someone who would like to take a course that sounds difficult and not much future. How most of them against it especially on the location of the university and the course itself. The thought of how spoil the kids are (for getting whatever he or she wants) and now to study overseas taking courses that for some of them don’t have a future...well make me think.

I’m not sure yet how am I going to shape my kids later. But I believe that we need to believe in the kids and also believe on rezeki. I believe on the upbringing of the family helps on the success of the kids later on.

On the above scenario parents who spoilt the kids...what’s not new on that? Aren’t current parents generation not tend to do that ? This usually came from parents yang dulu hidup susah and don’t want their child to face the same. Like when hubby had this conversation with our contractor last time. He has been working hard day and night....getting a daily rate for his job around 70 to maybe 100 ringgit a day. He provide motorcycle to his kids who study at college. Constantly give money to them when they ask for. For his daughter that still in primary school he gave around RM 2 or 5 I don’t remember a day as he don’t want his kids to face what he has to face last time. The feeling of being left out when they were small not able to get what they want makes them provide to the kids so that they don’t have to face the same thing. Well that is the scenario from an ordinary kampong guy that earn by doing any sort of work for a living.

When come to our generation where all are being measured by material, we ensure that our kids wear the latest designer brand, get the latest toy in store, expose them to software and electronics and some tend to compete with their peers. Let the kids as early as age 5 as my kids start to compete and compare on the smallest item like their eraser, pencil case, school bag and what not. And we as parents listen to their wailing to get a more new branded stuff to be parade at school the next day. We let them do that to us and we teach them to do that to us. Well let face it, we are also the same!

Now let’s get back to the scenario about this young chap that now planning to study overseas (of course sponsored by parents) doing some course that some of them think of not having a bright future. My husband has a take on taking something that is more general so that it increase the chances to get a job. I have the opposite thinking. OK we put aside the spoil brat kids that we may have raise. Well after all it our kids. Now when they want to shape their future one...is either we already give them guidance a long way down the road on the prospect career or we let them choose. And when they already choose what they want to do, is not our right to say yes or no. We can guide them , show some lights. Eg: if they want to become a pilot, then probably introduce them to pilot friends to listen to their experience, real life working experience. Is that what they want to do. Bring them to the education center and get them to see the subject that they need to take and pass. Then let them decide. I don’t mind my child taking some weird courses if they really want it. But they need to understand and be responsible with their choice. If it’s going to be funded by me, then they need to know that it’s a chance of a lifetime. They have siblings and it wouldn’t be fair if all the fund goes to him or her just because they don’t know what they want to do or take things for granted. If they believe in their choice I will believe in them. Who knows they are one of the people that is going to be like Bill Gates (fat chance) but hey nothing wrong to dream. And after all, after all the usaha and blessing from the parents, what come next is rezeki by God. You could be choosing a hell one course that promise a high chance of becoming rich and you might be a dean list for every semester. But if God says it is not your rezeki, it will not be yours! After all a degree nowadays is just a passport for you to get a job. It doesn’t guarantee you anything.

Then I guess it all boils back to the upbringing. Whether our spoil brat kids that we spend hundreds or thousands to them without them knowing the sweat of getting a penny will survive in the outside world? Those who whine to get the latest pencil case that move on to get the latest watch then next the designer handbag and multiple original games software will afford to get any of it using their own account. Are we going to become parents that took care of our child even when they are married and having their own child ? Well world has differently turn the other way round where we don’t look after our parents but look after our child. Then I wonder who going to look after us if we still looking after our child. Will they look after us later since we don’t look after our parents? Confuse eh ?

Anyway back on the young chap spoilt brat that want to study in overseas hehe...the other topic that caught me is that the location that he wants to study at is at the middle of the fun land that you could be deviated either to study or to party. Please spectators...I mean this is not their parents. You can be partying dalam hutan or outside or anywhere if you plan on one. Of course compared to if you already at the fun land not effort required to get on and party. Back to basic is always on upbringing. He or she can be deviated regardless where they are and is either we as parents thought them good enough or we as parents are lucky enough to get them back is all God willing again.

I might not be the best to comment after all since my kids is still small. But I believe in all the small things that matter to bring up a child. Since I’ve been brought up by my conventional parents that I swear I really hate them when I am a teenage. But as I grow older and wiser I get to understand what are they doing for us is for our own good. And how they believe in us to make the decisions in our lives as they already guide us enough during our childhood. And good thing even we don’t turn out to be a multimillionaire (yet) or some big shot (yet)....but so far we are all doing fine and ok and I hope I make them proud too. The same thing that I hope I can do for my kids later on.

note: my 3rd entry for the day....what does it means eh? actually i have more things to blog...but esok pulak lah ;)

Terlupa atau pelupa?

Isn't it nice to blame everything on the hormone right. Like me being forgetful.

Last week I left my purse inside my drawer in the office. I don't realize it until the next day when I am working from home and have to fetch my kids....which I thought of getting them something at the shop nearby and owh darn!!! The purse is not with me!.

If not how la I am going to buy food for us ? My brain thinking hard ... about hurm maybe I get some food that I can pay with my credit card...ops my credit card is in the purse. Hurm how about cash some money using my cheque! Aiyohhh than need my IC to identify myself....Luckily my mom call me right after that to tapau us some food.

Then next is when we pay a visit to my mil hse. Conveniently leave my handphone there. Err we already halfway through back to my house and we decided to make a turn back to PJ just to get the phone.

Yesterday I left my house key at my mom's hse and conveniently drove back to my house. Reach home with no keys and staring blank at my son (Fawwaz) then I ask him where is the key. He replied...don't know la ma...Again luckily my husband is just 10 mins away from home (he is with Aariz just return from swimming class) and I kill my time to drive around our housing area......

Each incident make me more alert with my belonging now...but hey I can't stop my hormone from making me forgetful right...Yeah right!